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Sanity SaversTM and More...
February 2012

Greetings for the upcoming holidays!

In Families Eating Meals Together I discuss the positive effects of parents and children regularly sharing a meal together.

In Tips for Living a Life with Fewer Regrets I offer thoughts to consider when reflecting on aspects of your life that you wish had been different.

WE CAN ALL ADDRESS THE LITERACY CRISIS IN THIS COUNTRY. Jumpstart is a national early education nonprofit organization that pairs well-trained, caring adults with underserved preschoolers who live in poverty in year long mentoring relationships. I was honored to be Jumpstart's Read for the Record's National Spokesperson on NBC's Today Show on October 6, 2011 and am delighted to be moderating a panel of its founders on February 22nd at the Yale Club in NYC. Thank you for helping to spread the word about the mission of Jumpstart and the remarkable strides being made in low income neighborhoods every day. We need your help, so please, if you can, contribute by clicking on www.jstart.org/donate www.jstart.org/donate. There is something that every single one of us can do to help those less fortunate. Over one million children live below the poverty level in the U.S. This shameful situation must change. Each of us has a responsibility to repair our world. Let us eliminate the 2-year achievement gap that exists between children from low income and those from middle income neighborhoods when they begin kindergarten!

Visit www.jstart.org to learn more about Jumpstart initiatives - such as Scribbles to Novels; Playdate With A Purpose; and Read for the Record.

You may be interested to visit Marlo Thomas' website, www.marlothomas.com, where I discuss psychology and relationship issues. Marlo Thomas and I talk about families and the holidays (and we surely have a lot of holidays!). Tune in for some sanity saving ideas for YOUR family gatherings.

Once again thank you for continuing to read and talk about Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life.

Check my website, www.drdaleatkins.com for updates on my appearances and use the Quick Links sidebar to access ongoing articles. I am available to speak to your group or organization. Please contact me directly at dale@drdaleatkins.com or contact the Speakers' Bureau at HarperCollins.

I appreciate you sharing this newsletter with your friends, loved ones, and colleagues by clicking Send to a Friend button below.

Wishing you health, peace and balance.

Dale

In this issue
  • Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life
  • Sanity SaversTM
    Families Eating Meals Together
  • Happenings
  • Sanity SaversTM
    A Good Daily Habit
  • Sanity SaversTM TIPS

    Tips For Living a Life with Fewer Regrets
  • A Thought

  • Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life
    SS Book Cover

    SANITY SAVERS: Tips for Women to Live A Balanced Life is filled with suggestions to save your sanity every day of the year.

    A must for any woman seeking to find her balance!


    Sanity SaversTM
    Families Eating Meals Together
    famiy dining together

    Schedules are busy, parents and children race to and from after school activities which can be dental appointments, sports practice, tutorials, or whatever, and sadly, family dinners are occurring less frequently, if at all. Yet there is no refuting the value of families eating meals together.

    A meal is about sharing and sharing is about caring and caring is about family and community. Children need to experience these elements as they find their place in the world, which begins with knowing that they have a place in their family.

    A friend of mine stayed with her good friend's teenage children while their parents were out of town. When she told the children what time dinner would be, they looked shocked, telling her that they hardly ever ate dinner together as a family. Well, my friend told the children that she expected to have them to sit with her at the table for dinner and she also informed them that this experience was to be technology-free!

    Cell phones, beepers, pagers, I-pads, TV, etc., were off as they sat together for a meal each evening. They talked, they laughed, they shared stories about their days. Dinner time together recharged the children for evening's homework time or whatever needed to be done. Perhaps when the parents return, the children will want to continue this "new tradition" of dining together and talking about everyone's day's events, politics, news, or whatever interests them and their parents.

    Research also confirms that children who share a family meal on a predictable, regular basis are generally happier, healthier and perform better at school than their peers who do not share a meal with family members. Teenagers, in particular, much to many people's surprise, benefit from dining together with their brothers, sisters, parents and other extended family members.

    Eating a meal together has many benefits including conditioning a child to what his or her culture is, how it works, and what is expected. Conversations, family stories, jokes, and daily news can all be shared at a table with (hopefully nutritious) food, without TV or other technological devices. This enhances the opportunity for a truly human connection to occur.

    Begin to see family mealtime as an anchor in your own as well as your children's lives. Introduce one night and put it on your calendar. Then, move to two and in doing so, appreciate that by having this ritual, you will be changing the culture of your family in a positive way.


    Happenings

    TODAY Show (NBC)
    Please check website, www.drdaleatkins.com, for latest updates, including changes of time.

    Greenwich Women's Wealth Roundtable Retreat
    February 6-7th: Facilitator / Lecturer.
    Mayflower Inn, Washington, CT.

    Alzheimer's Disease Discussion
    February 10th: 3-5PM. Discussion focused on Alzheimer's Disease and its effect on the family as part of a live patient presentation for 1st year medical students.
    Miller School of Medicine, University of Miami, Miami Beach, FL.

    Canyon Ranch Miami Lecture Series
    February 17th: 7:30PM. Featured Author. Topic: Couples Communication: From the Heart.
    The Conservatory, Canyon Ranch, 6801 Collins Avenue, Miami Beach, FL.

    Jumpstart Alumni Event
    February 22nd: 6-8PM. Moderator for Panel of Jumpstart Founders at Jumpstart Alumni Event.
    The Yale Club of New York City, 50 Vanderbilt Avenue, New York, NY 10017.

    Dr. Atkins is also the focus of an article, Work, Life, Balance, written by James Reisler. The article will appear in the December 2011 issue of TC Today Magazine. A PDF of the article will be available on www.drdaleatkins.com mid-December.

    About.com
    Topics by Dr. Dale Atkins:
    Tips for Getting Along with In-Laws: http://video.about.com/marriage/Tips-for-Getting-Along-With-In-Laws.htm;
    Warning Signs of a Troubled Marriage: http://video.about.com/marriage/Warning-Signs-of-a-Troubled-Marriage.htm;
    Issues to Deal with before Marriage: http://video.about.com/marriage/Types-of-Issues-to-Deal-With-Before-Getting-Married.htm;
    Warning Signs of Cheating Spouse: http://video.about.com/marriage/Warning-Signs-of-Cheating-Spouses.htm; Tips for Maintaining Interfaith Marriages: http://video.about.com/marriage/Tips-for-Maintaining-Interfaith-Marriages.htm;
    Tips for Growing Old Together
    :
    http://video.about.com/marriage/Tips-for-Growing-Old-Together.htm;
    and, Most Important Questions to Ask Before Getting Married: http://video.about.com/marriage/Most-Important-Questions-to-Ask-Before-Getting-Married.htm
    .

    Visit Marlo Thomas' site to access my relationship column and Mondays with Marlo video stream. http://marlothomas.aol.com/search/?q=dale+atkins

    Read Dr. Atkins' chapter, "Therapeutic Issues with Recipients of Cochlear Implants," in the new text, Psychotherapy With Deaf Clients From Diverse Groups, Second Edition.
    Edited by Irene Leigh, and published by Gallaudet University Press.

    Read Dr. Atkins' chapter, "Family Involvement and Counseling in Serving Children Who Possess Impaired Hearing," in the new text, Introduction to Aural Rehabilitation.
    Edited by Raymond H. Hull, and published by Plural Publishing.

    I invite you to visit my website to access archives of articles and interviews on line.


    Sanity SaversTM
    A Good Daily Habit
    Miami sunrise

    Create Calm

    Visualize the image of the deep ocean waters that remain calm while storms rage above. We all have the ability to find the calm that resides deep within us as the surfaces of our own lives appear tumultuous. Seek calm within your soul through deep breathing, meditation, or visualization, as you discover ways to support yourself during difficult times.


    Sanity SaversTM TIPS

    Tips For Living a Life with Fewer Regrets
    pink rose

    Whether or not you believe that souls live forever, there are lessons to be learned from those who are close to death. As people reflect on their lives, they often recall and sometimes regret the way they behaved in their relationships.

    One of the most important lessons we can learn is how to maximize the potentials in our everyday lives, particularly, extracting from the myriad opportunities, ways to be kind, empathetic, helpful, compassionate, and forgiving.

    At different points in our life we may have different regrets. In great part, how we incorporate the feelings and lessons associated with these regrets determines the quality, depth, purpose, joy, connection, and meaning we have in our lives.

    A few common regrets we can do something about now are:

    Work Less and Spend Time with One's Family. - Find a way to be more "present" with your family when you are with them. Many people regret working so hard that they miss much of their children's growing up, and / or miss out on connecting to and supporting their partners' growth in meaningful ways.

    Live a Life That Reflects Your True Character. - Better to live a life that is truly, authentically, yours rather than a life that reflects what someone else envisioned for you. When someone says, "you should be" or "you should do" it is important to weigh their opinion carefully against your own inner voice and direction.

    Express Your Feelings. - Some people regret having not expressed their true feelings. They may have fear of inciting someone else's anger or disappointment so they bury their feelings. Some people regret expressing feelings, particularly anger, in ways that were hurtful.

    Break Old Patterns. - People regret rehashing history rather than learning from earlier experiences, letting them go, and integrating lessons learned from those experiences into present and future relationships. Learning ways to break destructive habits allows people the opportunity to let themselves laugh, play, be spontaneous, and embrace enjoyment in their life.

    Once we realize the regrets we or others hold, we can pay attention to living a life with purpose, meaning, and joy no matter what our circumstance. And we will likely have fewer regrets when we live with more focus and consciousness.


    A Thought

    "Keep a green tree in your heart and perhaps a songbird will come."

    Chinese Proverb


    DALE V. ATKINS Ph.D. is a licensed psychologist, lecturer and commentator in the media who appears on the Today show.

    She has more than twenty- five years of experience and focuses on living a balanced life, parenting, aging well, managing stress, life & work transitions, family connections and healthy relationships.

    Dr. Atkins is the author and/or co-editor of several books including:

  • Sisters
  • From the Heart:
    Men and Women Write Their Private Thoughts about their Private Lives
  • Families and their Hearing-Impaired Children
  • I'm OK, You're My Parents
    How to Overcome Guilt, Let Go of Anger and Create a Relationship that Works
  • Wedding Sanity Savers
    How to Handle the Stickiest Dilemmas, Scrapes and Questions that Arise on the Road to Your Perfect Day.
  • And her newest book . . .

  • Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life
  • .

    Find out more....
    Quick Links...

    DrDaleAtkins.com

    MarloThomas.com

    BloomOnLine.com
    Dr. Dale's Sanity Savers for a Balanced Life

    KathleenDaelemans.com
    Dr. Dale's Healthy Eating & Lifestyle Advice

    WeddingChannel.com
    Dr. Dale's Wedding Advice

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    I'm OK
    You're My Parents
    How to Overcome Guilt, Let Go of Anger, and Create a Relationship That Works




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