Dr. Dale Atkins, PhD Psychology P.C.
Sanity SaversTM and More...
June 2014

Greetings!

Well, I finally took the plunge and am now on twitter. Please follow me at @DrDaleAtkins.

In this month's article, The Value of Taking a Vacation, I discuss the multiple health and social benefits when we take time away from our "normal routine."

In Tips for Dealing with the Death of Similarly-Aged Friends, I offer suggestions for ways to be present with the loss while appreciating where we are as we move through our life.

Please visit my website, www.drdaleatkins.com for information and updates about my professional interests, thoughts, and engagements. Feel free to contact me directly if you would like me to speak to your group or organization at dale@drdaleatkins.com.

I appreciate you sharing this newsletters by clicking the Send to a Friend button below.

Wishing you health, peace and balance.

Dale

In this issue
  • Sanity SaversTM
    The Value of Taking Vacations
  • Sanity SaversTM
    A Good Daily Habit
  • Sanity SaversTM TIPS

    Tips for Dealing with the Death of Similarly-Aged Friends
  • Happenings
  • Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life
  • JUMPSTART
  • A Thought

  • Sanity SaversTM
    The Value of Taking Vacations

    EVERYONE needs a vacation. Did you realize that even PLANNING our vacation can increase our happiness?

    And when we are away from our normal routine, we tend to be more relaxed, feel restored, energized, less stressed, willing to try new things, and, well, just plain happier.

    There are studies to confirm that those of us who vacation annually are healthier and happier, more content and productive in our work, and more satisfied with our relationships. Those of us who take vacations with family members often report feeling more closely bonded and reconnected with each another. Because a vacation environment is typically less pressured and more relaxed, we have a chance to get to know the people we think we know well in different ways. It is during BREAKS from work and our normal, often very busy life routine that we get many of the best and most creative ideas related to work and relationships! While on vacation, our brains actually get refreshed.

    When we are on vacation, we are more likely to try new things, explore new places, or when we revisit places, we tend to view them with "new eyes." Being away from the pressures of daily living can do that. Also, we are more likely to play. Think about how much we allow ourselves to be silly, laugh, and "play" when we are in our normal routine?

    Too many of us leave our vacation days "on the table." When we do this we hurt ourselves and our place of work. When we do not go on vacations we are more likely to become sick, focus on that which is NOT going well, and be considerably less productive at work.

    One of the best ways to manage stress is to take a break from it. Vacations can serve as a great break. When we return, despite the pile of work waiting for us, we will likely be rested, energized, happier, healthier, and bring a different perspective to whatever we do.

    *Photo courtesy of Ji-Eun Wax.


    Sanity SaversTM
    A Good Daily Habit
    null

    Live This Day Only.

    Many of us spend much of our precious time and energy worrying about "tomorrow," creating myriad scenarios of the many ways something can go "wrong."

    Appreciating that there are various outcomes possible and planning for what we might do in the event one of them happens is different from spinning into a downward spiral of worry.

    Our time and energy is better spent on what is going on in our life "now," staying as much in the present moment as possible, focusing on tasks to move toward reaching our goal, while visualizing the outcome we would like to have.


    Sanity SaversTM TIPS

    Tips for Dealing with the Death of Similarly-Aged Friends
    null

    More people than any other time in history are living into their eighth, ninth and 10th decades. Many are doing so healthfully while others are less so. A tough thing about living long is that our age peers die. Being vitally engaged in life, especially when we are lucky enough to have our mind and / or body remain healthy, does not insulate us from being aware of our mortality. The ways we view that mortality is our choice.

    How we deal with that awareness as well as how we deal with the death of those we love is often mitigated by those who know us and try to bring us comfort. An attitude of "Well, they were old and lived a good life" may indeed be true, but does not recognize the "meaning" of their death to those who remain. Yes, for most of us, the longer we have someone in our life, the luckier we are; but that does not negate that we will miss them when they are gone. As someone recently shared with me, she mused about a dear friend who died. After nearly eight decades of friendship: "She knew me better than and longer than anyone else. She walked my life path with me. We shared everything. We had a "good run" but my sadness is so strong. I am not sure I know how to go along the path without her."

    Consider these tips to guide you:

    Recognize that the Death of a Loved One is Felt Significantly at any Stage of Life. - Recognizing the blessing of a long life does not preclude missing that person and being sad with their passing.

    Share Stories and Memories with Those Who Knew as well as Those Who did not Know the Person. - Each life has meaning. Each of us is special. Sharing stories and memories with others gives us a chance to also share what we learned from the people who died, which helps to focus on how we were affected by their being a part of our life.

    Consider Performing a Ritual in Memory of Your Loved One. - Whether it is lighting a candle, commemorating a "bench," visiting a place they loved, listening to their favorite piece of music, planting a tree in their honor, or making a donation to an organization whose purpose reflects their values, rituals can be a powerful part of memorializing and healing through loss.

    Connect with Empathetic Family and Friends. - Younger family and friends can help us as we go through adapting to our loss. When others recognize the difficulty we experience by acknowledging our pain, and encourage us to go on, we feel "held" as well as "heard."

    Keep Living. - Make attempts to spend time doing what you enjoy with people who are meaningful to you.


    Happenings

    TODAY Show (NBC).
    Dr. Atkins is a frequent contributor.

    Please check website, www.drdaleatkins.com, for updated appearances.

    VERIA Network
    June 2nd, 2PM: The Value of Vacations.
    See www.veria.com for channel information.

    U.S. Trust Women and Money Series
    June 5th, Speaker: Preparing for the Unexpected.
    New York, New York.

    Sixty and Me Interviews
    Four interviews with Dr. Atkins, conducted by Margaret Manning, throughout the month of April covering the following topics: stress and worry, care-giving, downsizing, and friendships.
    http://sixtyandme.com/elderly-care-how-to-be-a-caregiver-while-taking-care-of-your-own-life-interview-with-dr-dale-atkins/

    Experience Life Magazine
    The Cares of Caregiving, by Jon Spayde. Interview.
    March, 2014 issue.
    http://experiencelife.com/article/the-cares-of-caregiving/

    I hope you enjoy my recently released chapter, "Family Involvement and Counseling," in the new text, Introduction to Aural Rehabilitation, Second Edition. Edited by Raymond H. Hull, and published by Plural Publishing.

    I invite you to visit my website to access archives of articles and interviews on line.

    My sincere thanks to website developer, Barry Brothers, who, along with Carina Ramirez Cahan, brought vision and positive, creative energy to the site. Do take a look at Barry's work here: http://www.thelimulusgroup.com/bb and consider him for your business, development, design and communication needs.


    Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life

    SANITY SAVERS: Tips for Women to Live A Balanced Life is filled with suggestions to save your sanity every day of the year.

    A must for any woman seeking to find her balance!

    Once again thank you for continuing to read and talk about Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life.


    JUMPSTART

    WE CAN ALL ADDRESS THE LITERACY CRISIS IN THIS COUNTRY. Jumpstart is a national early education organization that recruits and trains college students and community corps members to serve preschool children in low-income neighborhoods in year-long mentoring relationships. Jumpstart also partners with families, preschool centers, institutions of higher education, community groups and a variety of other groups and individuals to make certain that every stakeholder in a child's life is working to provide them with a high quality early education.

    Jumpstart's proven curriculum helps children develop the language, literacy, and socio-emotional skills they need to be ready for school, setting them on a path to close the achievement gap before it is too late.

    Please help to spread the word about the mission of Jumpstart and the remarkable strides being made in low income neighborhoods every day. If you can, contribute by clicking on www.jstart.org/donate www.jstart.org/donate. Over one million children live below the poverty level in the U.S. This shameful situation must change. Each of us has a responsibility to repair our world. Let us eliminate the 2-year achievement gap that exists between children from low income and those from middle income neighborhoods when they begin kindergarten!

    Visit www.jstart.org to learn more about Jumpstart initiatives - such as Scribbles to Novels - held on May 13, 2014, at Cipriani Wall Street. Laura Schroff, author of An Invisible Thread, was our featured guest.


    A Thought

    "Summer afternoon-summer afternoon; to me those have always been the two most beautiful words in the English language."

    Henry James


    dale with samson

    DALE V. ATKINS Ph.D. is a licensed psychologist, lecturer and commentator in the media who appears on the Today show.

    She has more than twenty- five years of experience and focuses on living a balanced life, parenting, aging well, managing stress, life & work transitions, family connections and healthy relationships.

    Dr. Atkins is the author and/or co-editor of several books including:

  • Sisters:
  • A Practical, Helpful Exploration of the Intimate and Complex Bond between Female Siblings
  • From the Heart:
    Men and Women Write Their Private Thoughts about their Private Lives
  • Families and their Hearing-Impaired Children
  • I'm OK, You're My Parents
    How to Overcome Guilt, Let Go of Anger and Create a Relationship that Works
  • Wedding Sanity Savers
    How to Handle the Stickiest Dilemmas, Scrapes and Questions that Arise on the Road to Your Perfect Day.
  • Sanity Savers: Tips for Women to Live a Balanced Life
  • Find out more....
    Quick Links...

    DrDaleAtkins.com

    Today.com

    Contact Us

    Website Developer

    I'm OK
    You're My Parents
    How to Overcome Guilt, Let Go of Anger, and Create a Relationship That Works




    Join our mailing list!